Flags

Have you heard of the saying, “trust your gut”? It’s not just a saying, it’s a real thing. You ever get that feeling that you know something is just not right? You don’t know exactly what it is, you just know something is off.

Don’t ignore this feeling. So many times we not only ignore this feeling, we also ignore every sign leading up to it. Some of my closest friends always told me not to ignore the signs. The red flags are always there, it’s up to us to acknowledge them.

Let’s go over two reasons why we choose to look past them:

Afraid of being alone.

Being alone can suck at times. We have a desire to share certain things with someone. We want to talk about our stresses of the day or our good news and accomplishments. I’m not afraid to be alone, as I am naturally an introvert and am good with a cup of coffee and a book. With that being said, I still struggle. My struggle is not having someone to create memories with. I love to travel to different cities and islands and just going away for the weekend. In reality, it doesn’t justify staying in an unhealthy relationship in order to have that. We have to learn to be alone and comfortable in doing so. It’s a time to reflect on what we want in life. What kind of relationship do we desire? We should not settle for what less than best for us!

 Afraid of not being loved again.

Love is a motivator of all things. When you feel loved, you tend to go above and beyond for the other person. Even if it means sacrificing your own needs and wants. So often we get into a relationship that is better than the one before and get into the mindset, that we can deal with anything because we’ve dealt with much worse. I’m here to tell you that it is still not okay. You don’t want better than before, you want the BEST! Why do we settle for someone who’s love is conditional? Is it because we don’t want to start over or is it because we’re comfortable because after all, it’s not that bad. I don’t know about you, but I want to be loved unconditionally–flaws and all. No one is perfect. There is someone out there in this human population that will love me no matter what and same for you! They will love us through the good, bad, and ugly.

If your gut is telling you that something is off, believe it. If you feel that your significant other is being untruthful, acknowledge it and ask questions. If that person explodes with anger, you have received your confirmation that it’s a lie and something is going on. People who tell the truth will not become angry and turn the table on you.

Let’s learn to acknowledge and address red flags for what they are and stop overlooking them.

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” -Maya Angelou

TRUST YOUR GUT!!