You Are Enough

We’ve all been told that we are enough by people who care about us at some time or another. I personally didn’t accept it as the truth. I even have “ I am enough the way I am” tattooed on my arm and I remember the exact moment that I chose that, walked into the tattoo shop and got it done. I felt abandoned and left out by my then husband. He had gone on a motorcyle ride to the track and didn’t want me going. At that moment I said “no, I am enough the way that I am.” I don’t need to change to be accepted, to be included, or to be loved. As time went on, I was left out and left behind more times than not. No matter how much begging I did, it was not going to happen unless he wanted me around. 

This behavior is of a Narcissist. Webster defines it as “a disorder in which a person has an inflated sense of self-importance.” You see, it is not really about you at all. It is about making themselves feel inferior and more important than someone else. They put themselves on a pedestal and expect someone to serve them when they need. These types of personalities expect you to be at their beck and call at all cost to you. They will point out flaws and make you believe that if you fix that one flaw, they’ll love you. So you fix it and guess what? Then they point out a different flaw and you fix that one too and then another. It is a vicious cycle of mental and verbal abuse. They will make you believe that your friends and family are not for you and are truly against you in order to isolate you. YOU are the only person who can stop this cycle. You may be asking “How can I stop this cycle”…GET OUT! Leave! They will NEVER change. They will use the words “I’m sorry” over and over again. They will cry and threaten suicide. Trust me, they are too self righteous to ever commit suicide. That is a manipulation tactic that they use to put fear in you. They want you to believe that if they commit suicide, it will be your fault. I have even been told “Your name will be written with my blood on the walls before I shoot myself so that everyone knows that it is your fault.” And yet three years later, he is still alive. Imagine that.

So now we have reached a point for you to decide if you’re going to stop and accept that no matter what you do or how much of yourself that you change, that person will not truly love or accept you. The situation will not get any better longer than a few days and then you’re back to square one. When are you going accept that you are enough exactly the way that you are? Sista, I am here to tell you that you are beautiful, YOU ARE ENOUGH, and you will make it!