Invisible Bruises

Bruises aren’t always visible. Some bruises are left on our mind and heart. It sometimes hurts more than visible wounds ever will. Visible ones heal and go away. The ones on your mind and heart take a lot longer to heal, and sometimes never do.

Those of us who have experienced verbal abuse replay the hurtful words that were said over and over in our mind. We struggle to break the thought cycles of them. We let it define us. We let it control us. By doing this, we’re allowing it to affect us long after they are said. The abuser doesn’t lose sleep. The abuser doesn’t even think about us, yet here we are…losing sleep and letting their words make us feel less than.

This is still a struggle for me at times. One example is, I have a bad habit of touching my face. I usually do it when I’m anxious or nervous. Most times, I don’t even realize that I’m doing it. I used to get told, “you like looking like a meth addict huh”. As in, I need to stop picking my face or that’s what people will think that I am. I cry out of frustration because I feel like the cycle of touching it, breaking out and picking won’t end and I hear those words every single time. I literally beg God to help me break this habit. What could have helped was being asked, “what are you anxious or nervous about and do you want to talk about it” instead of being called names and made to feel ugly. What are some of the words that have been spoken to you that have left invisible bruises and made you feel not good enough?

Remember when we used to say, “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”? That’s a load of BS and we all know it. Words hurt! Words have a lot power behind them so be careful. Especially during a heated discussion with someone. You may end up saying something that you didn’t really mean but you can never take it back. You can never unsay hurtful things. Its okay to take a couple of seconds to think about a response before saying it.

Words can cause healing or they can cause pain. Which one are you choosing? Do you want to be responsible for leaving invisible bruises on someone? Personally, I don’t.

My Mom told me something today that resonated. She told me to remember that I’m already validated by God. I want you to know, you are too.