This is a follow up from the last post, God’s Plan. The initial reaction when sitting down with Brodie and explaining what God had dealt with me about, living in sin, was not a good one. Because of the hurt that was done to Brodie in the past by his ex-wfie, he heard “leaving” and shut down immediately and was unable to hear or process the rest of what was being said. He also felt like there may be a chance of my using God as an excuse to end our relationship to be with someone else. This was not the case at all. Brodie felt that he was…

Do you ever mistake God’s plan for your own? You ever feel like you hear his voice and you’re where he wants you but then he starts to stir something up in your spirit and deal with you on something that he’s dealt with you on before and you did not listen? God, I thought I did this the right way this time. Only, I didn’t do it 100% in compliance to your word. Only, I’m not getting your blessings as I would have been if I would have just listened…and now you’re dealing with me about it. AGAIN. I’m sure God is up there thinking, “Yea, Clarissa, again because…

Let’s talk about verbal abuse. Do you know what it means? According to Wikipedia: It is the act of forcefully criticizing, insulting, or denouncing another person.  It is a destructive form of communication intended to harm the self-concept of the other person and produce negative emotions. It is a pattern of behaviors used intentionally to control or manipulate others or to get revenge. Have you experienced these types of behaviors from someone you love? Hurt from verbal abuse just hits different. Especially, if your love language happens to be Words. (Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman) I’ve said this before, sometimes I would have preferred to be physically hit instead of…

At the beginning of your relationship did you think, “wow, this is an awesome person. I can see myself with him or her for the rest of my life.”? Did you share that feeling with your family and friends? I did. Here’s the thing. With a Narcissist, the beginning of relationships are always the best. It is only in the beginning that they are on their best behavior, besides when they are in front of people. It is only in the beginning that they’ll bring out their best tricks to impress you. Why? Because they have to put on the show in order for you to fall in love with…

  Over the years I was given a word on the subject, “waiting for the husband that God has for me.” I was told to put God first and allow HIM to be my husband until then. Needless to say, I did not obey that advice. I kept doing what I wanted to do and relationships ended. After every one, I would be reminded of what God spoke. Then a new relationship would start and I would put God on the back burner with hopes that the new boyfriend would give his life to Jesus and I can put God back into my life as He should be. I had…

I’m sure you all have heard the phrase, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”.  My question is, does it have to be the same person that fools us twice or can it be two different people with the same Narcissistic behavior that fool us twice? So here’s the thing. I dated and married a Narcissist as you may already know if you’ve read some of my previous posts. In September of 2015, I was able to break completely free of him and not on my own. At the time, we were no longer living together, yet he still had complete control over me. Until…

Ever heard the song, “Girl Crush” by Little Big Town? It’s about a woman who states that she has a girl crush on someone who has the attention of the one she loves. The song states that she wants to taste the lips of the other woman because it taste like his. She states that she wants everything that the other woman has, including her long blonde hair and magic touch. If she had what the other woman had, then he would accept her and want her instead. This song came out during the time of my wanting to be accepted by my Narcissist, also known as, my husband at…

  Remember when you heard the word, “narc” and it meant that a person named someone when they were under pressure for a crime that was committed? well, this isn’t the same. Now when you hear Narc, it is short for Narcissist. Have you ever shared your dreams and desires with a Narc? They were shot down weren’t they? Afterward, it left you feeling stupid for even thinking for a second that you could have something for yourself. I remember telling my Narc that I wanted to go back to school for nursing. His exact words were, “I’m not supporting you for two years to go back to school.” Now,…

Every morning, you wake up and plan your day. As you begin to start with your first planned task, you are pulled in a different direction and it continues throughout the day. When you are finally able to return to the planned task, you realize it’s the end of the day and nothing you had planned has been completed. What do you do? Which part of your life now has to suffer in order to complete your tasks? It could be work that you’re having trouble balancing. Or maybe its home life and the kids’ activities. Or maybe its all of it combined. At what point do you accept that…

“God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7   What are some fears that cause you to walk on eggshells? For almost two years, I would come home after work and make sure that I did three things: sweep, mop and dust. My ex-husband complained about the dog hair, which were from his dogs. As in, he had them before we became a couple. These were not small dogs either. One weighed in at about 50 lbs and the other about 90-95 lbs. The bigger one stayed outside most of the time and I would…